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Getting rid of the breakup blues ASAP… (weird ideas ahead!)

So we had that breakup for the 7th time. Oh we are such a hopeless romantic. Well life shouldn’t stop because someone doesn’t meet the same tangent as ours. Zindagi Gulzaar hi nahi, Salim-Javed bhi hai 😉

Get ready to ditch those post breakup blues within next five minutes, because considering the longevity and mortality due do the never ending pollution in metros. the last thing you should die is of a heartbreak! Here we go:

1.Shift+Delete them from your cellphones, from your room and every aspect of your life. Flush down those cozy (and cheesy) snaps of the so called happier times and give that teddy bear on steroids to your maid’s daughter. You both will end up living happily thereafter!

2.Go to the gym, run at level seven on the treadmill or squat 10 times using that barbell. The pain of workout is much more excruciating than the invisible pain of a broken heart. Moreover you get the feel good hormones (endorphin) as a bonus!

3. Turn on the music, spare the Aashiqui 2 tracks for a while. Go for Deicide, Eminem or even Dev D songs for a change…Scream the lyrics and let the anger flow out of your body.

4. Watch Pursuit Of Happyness, you will end up being happy. The main character of Chris Gardener(portrayed by the maverick-Will Smith) has gone through every hardships you can think of and yet wins over each one of them. And you are crying because your six month relationship didn’t work out!

5. Learn from Gru! Become a bad-ass like him. Make Pharrell Williams Despicable Me soundtrack as your background music for the next few days and see the difference.

6. Catch up with friends, let them make the plans. They somehow know how to do your perfect brainwash. Just make sure they are not hopeless romantic like you!

7. Wake Up, stop blaming yourself for the fight #83 which led to the breakup. Get critical of the person(sparing yourself for a while) and you would realize that leaving them alone forever is not that bad idea indeed.

8.No Dating for a month: Just stay with your own company(it’s called solitude and not loneliness!) for a while instead of suddenly developing feeling for that person who was only sympathizing with your loss. In short, get a life!

9. Watch Game of Thrones Season 4: Because even a witty guy like Tyrion Lannister fell for the fake charm of Shae. All that glitters is not gold mah man…

10. Take a walk to the nearest temple or shrine, observe the poor beggars living a life of eternal hopelessness and then look at yourself. Now go inside and thank the Almighty for everything he gave (and took away) from you. Practice gratitude.

11.Put your head on your father’s lap, feel the warmth of his love. Get the vibes of the strongest man you have ever known. He is the wall between the dirty world outside and your fairyland inside. Thank God again!

12.Get a pet, or just feed the stray dog…they will shower you with unconditional love.

13. Play with a kid and learn how to be happy without no reason.

14. Eat nice food (pundit recommends a cheese burst pizza!). Skip of you are following step 2!

15. Get out of the house, go to Murthal or Malaysia, but just get the hell out of your home and travel someplace nicer than the shit-land.

16.Don’t watch porn, it is like a drug, giving you a high and then dumping you back in depression!

17. Don’t Over analyse the situation, just go with the flow…

18.Boys Special: Pyaar Ka Punchnaama-The ultimate brainwash

19. Girls Special: Golgappas and street shopping 😉

20. Hold your breath for 30 seconds, at 28th second I swear you won’t give a damn about why he/she left you!

Phew that was easy. You see just don’t rely on someone so much that you lose your own identity. You have your own life with your own purpose and nobody should dominate it. Come on, its just a breakup .Khiltein hai gul yahaan mil ke bichadne ko… Par chaman mein aur phool bhi khilenge! So get happy and forget that bozo…

Cheers!

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